APRIL FOOL’S: UNW no longer permits any visitation hours

by Decha Larson

UNW makes a bold move with visitation hour changes (photo courtesy of Jayden Anderson).

Visitation hours have been a trademark of the University of Northwestern–St. Paul for decades. Students have been chased down hallways by Resident Assistants and Resident Directors, only to receive angry emails and possibly fines. There have been a few myths that circled around campus, telling of certain legendary students who stayed past visitation hours. 

For some students, visitation hours are a blessing. Many students enjoy a quiet, peaceful and non-coed dorm room or study space. Students should feel safe and at home in their dorm rooms, and they should not have to feel uncomfortable or annoyed by a member of the opposite gender in their room. 

This is why UNW has decided not to permit visitation hours for any hours of any day. This means visiting another student’s room will not be allowed unless the students are of the same gender. Instead, students should find somewhere public if they want to hang out alone with their sibling, cousin, significant other or best friend. 

There are plenty of safe public spaces for students to hang out or hold hands with their significant other, such as the Berntsen Library, Knight Performance Hall, Nazareth Hall or even in the cafeteria in the Billy Graham Community Life Commons. In the cafeteria, students can spark conversations in a loud environment over a semi-hot meal through the plexiglass. It can provide a great ambience for romance and friendship. Some students of the more adventurous type will possibly want to go off campus to popular spots such as Spyhouse Coffee Roasters or Grumpy’s Bar and Grill.

UNW has also made the decision to forbid public displays of affection, or PDAs, of any form while students are on campus. Students will not be allowed to attend the same classes as the opposite gender. In addition, students will no longer be taught by a professor of the opposite gender. This is effective immediately. 

An esteemed member of the UNW executive staff anonymously stated: “I think that this is the best decision. We, the faculty of [UNW], believe that UNW could even open up another campus so that the opposing genders could be completely separate in their day-to-day academic activities. There would possibly be separate forms of student identification to gain access to the buildings on the respective campuses, ones that ensure the separation of genders. This fall, we will implement many new regulations, and this visitation hours extension is only the beginning of a bright new future for the UNW community.” Disclaimer: This quote was not actually said by anyone representing UNW.

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